Category Archives: Humor

the new broom

Sometimes it doesn’t pay to teach your child to tell time.

INT. BEDROOM – DAY

KAREN and CHRIS are asleep in bed. They open their eyes to find the GEEKLET standing over them, sighing loudly to catch their attention.

CHRIS

(blearily)

Hi, sweetie. What time is it?

GEEKLET

It’s 9:10.

CHRIS

OK, we’ll be up in a minute.

GEEKLET

All right. I’ll come back and tell you when it’s 9:11.

…and yes, it’s occurred to us that he acts a lot like Sheldon Cooper. The difference is that Sheldon is an adult, and hopefully the Geeklet will grow out of this. Hopefully.

Happy Towel Day!

A belated Happy Towel Day to everyone!

Dont Panic!

Don't Panic!

From Wikipedia (which, I remind all students, is NOT a source!):

Towel Day is celebrated every May 25 as a tribute by fans of the late author Douglas Adams. On this day, fans carry a towel with them to demonstrate their love for the books and the author. The commemoration was first held in 2001, two weeks after Adams’ death on May 11, 2001.

COMPLIMENTS FRIEND

Dear American:

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude.

I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you.

I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s. This transactin is 100% safe.

This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds as quickly as possible. We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance. My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred.

Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction. After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.

Yours Faithfully Minister of Treasury Paulson

[from sources unknown, via John Tantalo]